Laundry.

There were baskets of it everywhere this morning. Okay, not everywhere.

Why can't I just put the clothes away right after I fold them? Thanks to my husband, everything is where it belongs. Down to the last tee. Why do I let full baskets sit around for so long that he ends up putting his own boxers away? Isn't that what I'm here for?

I've been fighting an awful headache today. It makes me cranky. Really cranky. Funny thing, I was telling my mom yesterday that I hardly ever get headaches, unless they're accompanied by runny noses or puking. Pride goes before the fall.

________________________________________________________________

I love being a nanny. Joyce is super sweet. I'm learning a lot about her-- she loves to read books and adores being praised, she has an obedient heart and could be outside all day. She can't get enough kisses from the dog and doesn't like to snuggle. She loves to sing with me, but only when I initiate and tries to get up from the table between every bite of food.

Having Peter home more has been a blessing too. A week ago I wouldn't have thought that him losing his job would be a blessing in disguise. I guess that is how God works. (When will I get that through my aching head?).

My husband is great at always seeing the good in things. He truly is an optimistic man. He immediately saw how losing his job would change our life in a better way. That blesses me.

He's got brains too. After philosophy class yesterday he approached his professor with some questions about the class. His professor then said, "Uh yeah, you might want to try getting into Honors Philosophy."

Yeah.
___________________________________________________________

Before I go, I wanted to include several things I've learned about living in the city. Cleveland, to be precise. Sometimes I miss living between cornfields.

• during summer months, skunks (including their stink) are everywhere. No really. Everywhere.
• you can't put trash cans at the curb.
• fireworks are illegal.
• you need a permit from the city to have a yard sale.

____________________________________________________________

Pray for me. I had thought that by now I would be feeling better. I thought I wouldn't cry anymore. But I still do.

I know that "miscarrying is common", especially for one's first pregnancy, but that does not make me feel any better. In fact, it makes me feel worse. I know we "have time", and that we are "so young", but that does not take away the pain. The sting.

Truth is, I want to hold a baby. My babies.



-A.H.