April showers bring May flowers.

One day after work last week Peter and I went to a garden center to get some stuff to plant. I had a long list made of the things I knew I wanted, but we got there and I was a little overwhelmed, and confused. We left with some marigolds, basil, tomato and green bean plants. I'd like to eventually go back for some parsley, lavender, peppers and grape tomatoes. And flowers too, of course. But for just starting, it's a cute budding garden. No pun intended. (I'm growing more and more like my father-in-law every day!)

Our green bean plant. I don't know why I think plants look cute. But they do.

Tomatoes. I'm teaching myself to like them.

Basil. Yes. It's adorable.

One year ago today.

One year ago today Peter McCallum Hopkins put this big, beautiful, glistening ring on my finger. It's been one year of ups and downs, tears of sorrow and gladness have been shed. But it's been wonderful. Blissful. In fact, this past year has been the best year of my life.

So, from this:

To this:

There we are. Two peas in a pod. Lovers. Best friends.
And today, I can't even imagine where I'd be if I hadn't said yes. Though we all know I didn't hesitate once. ;) I am absolutely smitten.

-A.H.

There were never such devoted sisters...

Last week Peter and I were able to keep my youngest sisters while my mom drove Ashlee to Charlotte with a U-Haul full of furniture and clothes. Yeah, my big sister is getting married in 12 days. It was a total blast having them here-- we watched Kipper the Dog, Strawberry Shortcake and Robots. We ate peanut butter & jelly, ice cream sandwiches and strawberries. We did lots of shopping too.

Wednesday we traveled from park to park trying to find the best slide, biggest puddle, and highest swings. We took Loxley with us to the Coventry Peace Park (and saw the "NO DOGS" sign on our way out. Oops.), then went home and packed a picnic and headed to another park in Beachwood where Peter met us after work for a picnic dinner.
I always love the conversations that erupt with little ones. We were driving in the car somewhere when Anna began questioning me. It was rather precious and went like this:
Anna: Sis, are you married?
Me: Yes I am. That's why I live with Peter.
Anna: And now you can be a princess, and dance with Peter your prince?
Me: *smiles* Exactly.
Anna: And next will be me, I'll be the princess and I can dance with Aliza!
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Again, it's unfortunate that I'm not a photographer, for I'm sure many Kodak moments went uncaptured (spell-check is telling me that's not a word...). But here's what I did get:

-A.H.

Fragile lives.

Yesterday we were reminded of the frailty of life. It's scary how quickly the reality of certain things can slip one's mind. It's even scarier how something can be so real. So permanent.
A man from Canada that Peter works with, and was beginning to develop a close relationship with, was killed in a car crash Sunday night. It's sad to this his company may crumble. Even to think Peter will never talk to him again. To think he'll never hold his babies again. It's sad to think his wife had no idea he would never come home again. To think the last kiss they shared was their last ever.
To make our evening even sadder, we laid in bed and watched Moulin Rouge (Ewan McGregor, Nicole Kidman). The movie is set in France, 1899 amid the Bohemian revolution, where Ewan McGregor plays a poet who falls for Satine, the star courtesan of the night club called Moulin Rouge. We find out she's sick, dying, and does not have long to live. Long story short, their love affair is tragically ended when the Duke offers a Satine a great deal-- promising to fulfill her dream and make her a world-renown actress. She fakes her loyalty to the Duke and leaves Christain (Evan McGregor) confused and heartbroken. Later he returns to the Moulin Rouge to beg her love, she confirms it, and dies minutes later in his arms.
Call us pathetic if you must. We turned off the TV and Peter held me while I cried in his arms. Yesterday made me want to grab everyone I love and keep them all together, never be angry at anyone ever again, and if we have to separate, always on good terms.

-A.H.

Visitors on Meadowbrook Boulevard.

Oh, what a blessing this day is. Rarely will I post twice in one day, I'm sure, but this is just too incredible not to share right now.

After yesterday, I'm determined that the Lord brought these tiny treasures to me for a specific reason. To simply brighten my day? Perhaps. To make me smile? Definitely. To remind me that He is God the faithful and I am not? Absolutely.






-A.H.

Moody Mondays.

Yesterday was a great day. Church was awesome. Our afternoon consisted of a long scenic drive, and then a restful nap. And come evening, we headed back to church for a meeting with our pastor and elders for a membership interview.

We left church encouraged, with the reminder that there is so much more to life. Both Peter and I were inspired to structure our life in a more Christ-honoring way. In a way that all we do, not just some or most of, glorifies God.
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A quick interruption: on our way to church yesterday we were following a semi going 70 MPH when suddenly a burst of black and gray feathers showered the road. Yep, a goose. A sweet, innocent, diligent goose. The image is still in my mind (will it ever leave?)-- the poor innocent creature bleeding and helplessly flapping its wings, trying to move along the freeway. I cried the whole way to church.
I was relieved to see, on our way back to Hudson that evening, that the creature was no longer suffering, but had been put out of its misery, probably by another semi. This is morbid, I know.
Why did I have to see that? I don't know. My precious husband held my hand the rest of the way to church and wiped away my tears, apologizing that I had to see that. We have been given dominion over the animals, and unlike us, they don't have souls that will last forever. It doesn't necessarily make it easier, but it encourages me.
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After that great meeting I was sure I wanted to make the best of this week. Really, to have a great week. Yes, it's going to be busy, but why not be happy?

It's Monday morning and I've already allowed the Tempter to take hold. I've gotten upset, angry, mad, and tears filled my eyes because of so many things-- the random ants (not to mention they're huge!) working their way through our house, the dog poop I picked up with my bare hand because I didn't realize it wasn't covered by the plastic bag, and the fact that the only "fruit" we have in the house is applesauce and I don't feel like going grocery shopping ever again. To name a few. I know you're thinking, Goodness, she's emotional. But yes, I do cry about a lot of silly things.

They're minuscule things, really. The sun is shining and I've got shorts on. Jesus is Lord. And we've been redeemed!

-A.H.

Still nesting.

Today I'm being serenaded by Thom Yorke. But I can't bring myself to turn him off...

Yes, I'm still settling myself in. Still rearranging and organizing things. Really, if I didn't enjoy doing it so much I would leave things the way they are.

The promised photos of the table and bench:

I just threw a scarf, some candles and books on it and I think it's completely adorable, despite the spot on the back leg...


















As for the bench....it's really shot (and I know the porch needs cleaned). Maybe someday I'll scrape and paint it...But for now, it makes for a perfect piece of porch furniture.
There really is something rewarding about restoring things others were throwing out....


















One of the green chairs that I absolutely love. I'm hoping to recover them

Reflecting, etc.

It's rather difficult-- blogging with the not-so-distant sound of Carrie Underwood singing downstairs. I think before any thoughts begin flowing I'll need to run down and turn her off. But, the creaking stairs would wake-up the dog who's sleeping soudly just outside the room I'm in, and he'll surely follow me all the way down to the kitchen...

I'm half-disappointed in myself for not going to yoga class this morning. I'm not interested in the meditation, inner-reflection stuff, but the physical activity. I'll have to force myself to go next week. So, since I was feeling so bad about not going I took Loxley for a long walk ("long"= 1 mile max.). Well, it was long to him-- he could barely walk another block. Tsk, that heat.

Monday night is garbage night around here. It's amazing to see what the neighbors are pitching! Anything not quite trash-worthy, or anything that can be restored-- I'm on it! This week we found a sweet bench (I've been wanting one for the bathroom-- we have this long, awkward wall that needs something long but narrow to fill it. Perfect!) that will need painted AND a pretty blue table. It's got a broken leg, but the leg was with it and Peter's sure he can screw it back on. I'm so excited about our new finds-- I'll post pictures soon!

Friday night I got an awful haircut. Ok, so it's not awful. I only hate it when I'm trying to style it. And when we're going out. Or having people over. You get the picture. I have an appointment Sunday afternoon (yeah, the Sabbath) to get it "fixed". Problem is, I don't know how it should be "fixed". Would this be cute on me? http://www.hairstyleschat.com/images/cute-short-hair.jpg I'm a little afraid I don't have the face shape for it, though I like the idea a lot... And, I actually really like this, http://cn1.kaboodle.com/hi/img/2/0/0/164/d/AAAAAjUtkyIAAAAAAWTaDg.jpgbut I think her face is what makes me like it so much. She has such a severe jaw line. I love it. But I don't have that. Comment! Let me know what you think.

I've been convicted lately about contentment. Or discontentment. A couple weeks ago I sat down and thought over my life and all the changes that have occurred and the many blessings I've received, especially over the past 3-4 years.
In 2007 I met Peter. The minute I saw him, I knew he was the one. Sounds cheesy, cliche, I know. But really, I knew that I had to have him. So, late in 2008 we were "official", going-out, in-love. All that jazz. But just as quickly as I had wished away my single years, I found myself longing to be engaged. After all, the wedding was practically planned! I remember thinking, I know he's the one. What's the point of this?
So, in May of 2009 Peter proposed. Yes, it was perfectly romantic-- tossing pebbles at my window, climbing a ladder, crawling through the window, his shaky voice, my tear-filled eyes, laughter, kisses. It was a dream. But then, how much longer can we possibly wait? 7 months seemed like 7 years! I remember begging, crying, for him to make the hour-long drive to my house every night after work, just so we could be together. Engagement was hell. Ok, so the first couple weeks, maybe month, were fun. Everyone was excited, I loved telling people all the juicy, giggly details, showing them my heirloom diamonds, etc, etc... But oh! we just wanted to get married!
Then the wedding day finally came. I remember standing at the top of the aisle beside my dad, waiting for the piano to play that measure signaling me to take my first steps towards my Groom. Did we wait too long? It feels like it's been forever. Did we miss the downbeat? I think we missed it. Oh crap. Do I look as shaky as I feel? ...And then, it was all over. The hymns, the vows, the kiss, the cake. Pictures, champagne, sparklers. Done.
In just 3 days we'll be on that plane, I thought. I can't wait! We flew to Mexico, the honeymoon that had been dreamed of and planned for months, came home and, wow. If that wasn't reality hitting, I don't know what was!
I quickly began to wish we had a baby. Every morning, every night-- baby, baby, baby. I wasn't necessarily wishing away our newly-wed life. Or, I didn't think I was. But really, I was. I was discontent. Impatient. Just like I had been about every other season the Lord placed in front of me.
I spent so much time dwelling on the future and what was to come, or what I hoped was to come, that I caught myself rushing through where the Lord had me.
It's almost like I hadn't taken the time to stop and smell the flowers. And sadly, I hadn't realized I'd missed out on the beatiful scents until Fall hit, and then the petals fell. I have no regrets. I am not saddened when I look back at those years. In fact, I'm grateful for those years. I'm so thankful for what I've learned now, and for what I've been blessed with. And fortunately, Summer does come back around. So, don't forget to slow down. Breathe in. And enjoy the flowers.

-A.H.

What a weekend!

I often wish I were more of a photographer so I could blog our life in pictures. I think it's something about uploading them to the computer that deters me. But sometimes I fear I'll never have archive upon archive of our children growing...or even the puppy. :) Nevertheless, a photo-less summary of our weekend:


I really do regret that I didn't capture yesterday in photos. We had Peter's family (9,plus his sister Chloe's fiance) and my family (10) over for lunch. We always love when our two families get together-- it reminds us of how like-minded we really are, not to mention how frequently we laugh (or how infrequently we don't)! Plus, it was awesome having 22 people under one roof...

Yesterday I had a awful time getting dressed for church. I had an outfit (and maybe even a back-up plan!) picked out Saturday night, but my idea was foiled when I woke up to a cold, drizzling Sunday. Yuck. Too warm for corduroy, too wet and chilly for sandals, that shirt is too long for that skirt, my legs aren't shaved and I can't find tan stockings, it's Spring and I can't wear BLACK, etc., etc... We left for church with my poor husband possibly in a more distraught state than me. Why do I always take things out on him? It's not his fault that I am so difficult. Better yet, why am I so difficult? It's just an outfit. But then, it's an outfit! Ah, yes, that's what I let myself think 5 minutes before we have to walk out the door.
I'm inspired to go through my closet (for the second time in 3 weeks) and really sort through what I don't or can't wear. I probably have a few cute pieces in my closet, but where does that get me on a Sunday morning when we roll out of bed 15 minutes before we have to leave? Back to my inspiration. I'm going to hang everything by outfits. And, if I don't have a complete outfit-- that's accessories, shoes, everything-- it gets taken out until I can complete it. I can't be trying on 7+ different outfits in the morning, especially as a wife and mother. Hoorah! for simplicity.

-A.H.

Catching up with pictures.

ast week I made a homemade pizza. We used to do it quite a bit, but it can be so time-consuming so I gave it a break. Anyhow, I was craving a good, cheesy pizza (with stuffed crust and all), so I added it to last week's menu.This is the dough-- delish!-- that I used: http://www.fabulousfoods.com/recipes/article/46/17753

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Peter had Good Friday off, so we slept in then spent the day running errands and later went to my family's for a cookout. Saturday I planned a picnic. Actually, it had been planned for a while. We packed everything up-- roast beef, sharp sharp cheddar, rolls, black grapes, dried mango, 70% dark chocolate, pomegranate water, and apple pastries-- and headed to the Lakeview Cemetery where John D. Rockefeller, Eliot Ness and President Garfield are buried.

 

"please take me with you?"

He follows me everywhere...

...just in case I offer a "peanut butter lick."



His new favorite toy is a duck Peter and I found at Wal-Mart. It was a sad day when he chewed the nose off of his kitty. But, the duck quacks (well, it used to) and he likes that he can carry it around by the neck.

A To-Do List.

As I sit here and write (type, whatever) I'm devouring a hot fudge sundae that I decided would suffice for today's lunch. Every sentence (or every few words if it's a long sentence) I'll dig back in my bowl for another delicious scoop. Really, there is no point in posting this. But my sundae sure is satisfying.

Today I'm a bit overwhelmed, but excited, by all there is to do. My to-do list for today:

* wash and hang-dry Kate's table cloths and napkins [I brought them home with us after Easter lunch at her house yesterday]
* wash and put-away all laundry [this'll take a while]
* finish ironing
* pick-up prescription at CVS [Lord willing, last month of this, then we're going to try something NATURAL!]
* Home Depot - supplies to fix bed [it was made for us by an Amish friend of Peter's but needs some reinforcement in the center. Nothing my husband can't fix, of course!]
* grocery store - canned veggies, rice, etc., for dog food [I've been making our own dog food-- it's cheap, he loves it, and it's way healthier for him than the store-bought stuff!]
* dishes [our dishwasher has been broken for some time (it just needs replaced...) so we've been hand-washing the dishes since before we got married]
* walk Loxley
* pick-up dog poop (eww) [atleast it's done. That's all I can say]
* move clothes back to dressers on 3rd floor [we were up there right after we got married, but January and February held too many cold months, so we moved down into the guest bedroom. Now that it's warming up, I'm ready to get back into our sexy abode]
* move my clothes to closet in Purple Room [unfortunately, these old houses don't have "master" bedrooms with his and hers closets like I was used to. So, we have to keep our hanging clothes in separate closets in different guest rooms]
* put away my winter clothes [out with the old, in with the new]
* make dinner [I made a lasagna last week and popped it in the freezer for a day like today! <3 freezer meals!]
* snuggle with my Honey [the best and most important part of my day. that's why it's at the end. it's a good way to close a Monday]

There are so many more things I want to do-- bigger projects-- ones that I can't necessarily do on my own.
We have a "junk" room filled with old nick-knacks, books, weapons Peter made when he was 10, guns, laundry baskets of clothes that don't fit in our dressers, and so much more. I've been wanting to tackle that room for some time now; getting our hands on some great bookshelves would be a perfect start.

The picket fence that surrounds our house is, cute, but needs some sprucing up. I would LOVE to paint it, but our landlord wants it kept the natural wood color that it is. So, in an attempt to bring it to life, I'm hoping to plant hydrangeas (or another type of beautiful perennial) all around the perimeter.
Speaking of flowers, I have 4 packets of sweet peas (the flowers) that are due to be buried in the ground, but they need sunlight and most of our house (ok, all) is shaded by a huge oak tree in the front. The shade is great for keeping the house cool during the hot summer months, but now that I'm looking to plant, I'm wishing we got some rays!

Someone gave us an old desk that they no longer needed-- it was such an answer to prayer! We've been looking for furniture to make our cozy den, and now the pieces are coming together! It was dropped off and left in the living room and I'm pretty positive I couldn't carry it upstairs. I'll have to get Petey to do that one. I could probably carry the drawers.

We're also looking for patio furniture so we can enjoy these beautiful spring evenings and eat dinner by candlelight on the front porch. I'm hoping we can find something cute and vintage-y without having to pay an arm and a leg (which we don't have to offer). If not, I suppose a card table will do!

And now I'm just rambling and there are still a lot of things left on my list (frankly, the most wearisome and time-consuming things! Funny how that works...) so I'll be back to post more later.

-A.H.

Thursdays.

Every Thursday I babysit adorable twin boys. I head down to their house right after I take Peter to work and spend all morning and afternoon with them. I take them to their gymnastics class, then we come home and do phonics, catechism, workbooks and read. After which we have lunch and play for the rest of the afternoon. It really is a fun day.
Well last week they asked if I would take them to the pet store after gym class. I love animals. Sure, why not. After all, we had all afternoon and we could afford to kill some time and energy and not have any messes to clean up!
After walking up and back down every aisle, we finally found the (small) section of animals they had for sale. One boy went right to the cage of bunnies. "I want a rabbit. Miss Angela, can you please get me a rabbit? I choose that one. I want to name him Polka-Dot. Pookie, for short. Where are the cages? Let's get him out." The other headed straight to the reptiles. "Wow, look at that snake! Are there any tarantulas? I see lizards. I love tarantulas." I whisked him away from the creatures and tried to refocus them both on something more appealing and realistic. "How about a fish? Let's see if there's one that looks like Nemo! I used to have one that looked like this guy here." No avail. They wanted a bunny and something, anything, with more than 4 legs and a tail.
After quite some time we wrapped things up in there. I had to answer quite a few questions. Why do the lizards like their crickets to be jumping? Does the man at the counter put the bunnies in bags? Why are they called feeder fish? The whole way home we discussed how we needed to talk it over with their parents before we brought home animals, what the pets would be named, and when we could go back and get them.
As soon as their mom got home they ran to her begging for "pets". She was concerned that a goldfish might die, or that they would kill a rabbit, so in hopes of pleasing both parties, I suggested a beta fish. I've heard they live forever and require little or no maintenance.
The next week I went, there on the counter, sat two bowls with beta fish dubbed Pookie and Dono. I was sure to apologize to the boys' parents before I left and promised the dad we'd stay out of pet stores.

The first three weeks.

I've never wanted to be one of those bloggers that rambles on and on, only to get their point across, paragraphs later, to a very confused reader. Maybe mine will turn out that way, maybe it's just the way I write. Or maybe not. Oh dear, I'm afraid I've already begun.

By no means do I consider myself an expert, nor can I offer solutions to marital problems; we still are "newlyweds" after all (and will continue to be for at least another year or two!). I only know that after the bridal shower and bachelorette party and wedding day and honeymoon bliss, things were not quite as I expected.
The first several weeks of our marriage consisted of a lot of arguments. I mean, a lot. These were disagreements that we could sit down and discuss together, but they arose so often! My biggest struggle was loneliness, or possibly just boredom, and I often took that out on him. Having gone quickly from a busy family of 11 to a stay-at-home wife, things were very different. When Peter left for work the Monday after we got back from our honeymoon, tears filled my eyes. I remember thinking, I thought getting married meant we would be together all the time, forever. However unrealistic and just plain ridiculous I knew that was, part of me wished it to be true.

I would have days where I would harden myself to my circumstances, grow bitter towards my husband, tell myself I could do it all alone, and pretend as though I was enjoying life as it were. Sometimes still, I struggle with those thoughts telling me I am too dependent. Too needy. But then I am reminded that Peter is my earthly protector, my head and truly, my lover. Therefore, I am not convicted that any of the thoughts, feelings or yes, obsessions, I have for him are wrong. I do rely on him, for nearly everything. He is my leader, my protector and provider, and my laughter and joy. I do not idolize him, but I have found truth and love in submission, and when a husband fulfills his duties, the wife feels gratification and completion.

And truly, as time has gone on, I've certainly discovered ways to keep myself busy. The more days I spend at home, the more I find myself falling in love with certain things. Yes, several part-time jobs - like nannying and painting - have come my way also. But it really is rewarding to have loaves of bread cooling on the counter when my husband gets home. I love to rearrange our furniture, trying to find the best way to use every space. And, the Lord has been working in me. I am encouraged because I know the hours Peter and I spend apart every day only draw me closer to him. At the end of a day I find I have more love, more gratitude, more respect, for him as my husband.

A.H.